ROSE'S WINE REVIEWS (AND THE ADOPTABLE ROCKS INSPIRED BY EACH)
Look at what a hard worker she is. She planted that dead flower herself. Take her home and she'll help you plant dead things too. Click on the image to adopt her. (Pot and soil not included. We've been trying to grow a bonsai tree in that little pot for the last year, so it'll be any day now)
Terralsole: Brunello Di Montalcino Alfio Moriconi Selection 2006Rating: 4.3/5
"The king is dead! Ah, but the wine is decadent? Reminds me of the old wives tale, if not yellow let it brunello. Tastes of forest floor, Buddhist vibes and welcomed incontinence. Hint of cherry poppins. Fine grade sandpaper with notes of cello, rigatoni and courser grade sandpaper. If Reservoir Dogs was a wine, this would be a different wine."
Look at the picture this little rock just painted. It's not THAT sad. It's just a picture of himself with loving parents, of which he has none. Why don't you adopt him? Maybe he'll paint a picture of you too. Click on the image above. (Side Note: This rock probably didn't actually paint that picture. Because he's a rock. It's more likely that he stole it, so keep an eye on him)
Apothic: Winemaker's Blend Red 2013
Rating: 4.2/5
"Could have it. Should have it. Would have it? Not on my watch. Did it anyways. (rebbell) Boiler dang chowder pants. Gothic and subtly ferverent. Ski Lodge chic without the umlaut. 9/10 would accept as a gift again."
Look how pious and wise this priest is. He lives a very quiet and peaceful life, reading from his* bible and lounging next to an empty incense holder. Won't you adopt him into your family? You'll never have to go to confession again! But, you probably should. Click on the image above! *This looks exactly like the kind of bible you see in hotel drawers. We're not saying he stole it. It's just something we noted.